“What does school really look like?”

In my spare time, when I’m not writing or studying, I do watch a lot of movies and TV shows – specifically American teen movies and TV shows. You know, your high school dramas like Pretty Little Liars, Riverdale, (the classic) Mean Girls and that new one, The DUFF!

In light of the school year coming to a close, I thought I might share something interesting that I’ve noticed about American schools (or at least the way they are portrayed in these movies and TV shows) compared to the schools we have here in Australia.

These schools all seem to follow a formula for all their social and friendship groups. A hierarchy or a system which I think for us Australian kids, is just not relatable at all. You see these groups of teenagers and ‘middle school kids’, (which by the way are primary school kids, here) seem to be divided into factions based on one specific character trait! Like, for example; you’ve got your ‘jocks’ (sports players), your ‘nerds’, ‘emos’, ‘music geeks’, ‘hipsters’, ‘gangsters’ (the hip-hop kind), ‘fashion queens’, ‘rebels’ and the list goes on.

Oh, and don’t forget those god-awful; ‘popular’ or ‘cool kids’. Like, what the fuck? Sorry for the language, but seriously? The idea that such a thing exists, or that people are defined by exactly one character trait just seems so bizarre to me.

Now let me just quickly disclose, I’m not saying that ALL American schools work like this. I’m also not stupid enough to believe that the way high school is portrayed in movies and TV, is actually what it’s like in reality. Believe me, I learnt the hard way… I’m kidding… No, I’m not.

But it really isn’t relatable for us kids in Australian schools and who knows, there’s a possibility that it’s not even relatable for most American kids either. So, what does school really look like? What do friendship groups really look like?

Well, first of all, get rid of the words ‘popular’ and ‘cool kids’, they don’t exist! Not really. It’s a concept made up in the minds of people who perceive others as having more friends than they do or go to more parties during the week than they do. And how does that notion come about?... social media. That’s right, we think that just because one person posts all these photos of ‘Joe blow’s’ party that weekend, or because they walk the halls in massive groups, this automatically means they’re the ‘popular kids’.

Let me tell you some truth. In primary school (grade 5 and 6) I was part of the biggest friendship group in the school yard (no lie). Granted it was a small school, but there was a whole heap of us that hung out on the down-ball court at recess and lunch… Good times… ugh getting off track. Anyway, you could’ve easily called us the ‘popular kids’ at the time (as an ‘outsider’ beforehand, I did). But I realised that the truth is, in that group of friends, I was only close with one or two of them.

So now when I look at large groups of friends, I don’t see ‘popular kids’. I just see a bunch of kids who like to have a good time and post about it on social media a lot.

Also, side note; Something I learnt, watching a very interesting video clip on social media. We see our friends post on Instagram, and Facebook photos from parties or social events with their 'friends'. Even holidays and things like that. we immediately presume that somebody is living a better life than us. Major FOMO kicks in. and this is because we’re isolated; we’re at home on our laptops, and ‘they’ are out ‘there’. But the truth about social media is that it documents the best of people’s lives. It’s not showing the everyday, its showing the RARE times that people are having fun. MOST of the time, people are doing the same boring old thing that you are. Either going to work or school, or spending the weekends chilling out at home in their pyjamas! Trust me, you have nothing to worry about.

Wow, that was a long side note… anyway…

So, moving on from the non-existent ‘popular kids’, we do not have a faction system. If you are being completely honest with yourself, there is no way you could possibly be defined as being of one singular character trait. I blame these quizzes that people are constantly doing. You know the ones I’m talking about? When you answer a bunch of random questions to find out ‘which F.R.I.E.N.D.S character’ you are or ‘what type of girl’ you are. They used to be in magazines like DOLLY but now they’ve upgraded to online ones where you basically find a quiz on anything! From ‘which Sex and the City character’ to ‘what type of toast’ you are… I know!

Let’s, take the idea of ‘What type of girl are you?’. You’ll have four categories like; ‘Girly girl’, ‘Tomboy’, ‘Nerd’ and ‘Rebel’. You then answer a series of questions with a choice of A, B, C or D. if you answered most of your questions with an A, then you are defined as a Girly girl. The thing is, I found that I never got just one majority. I always had an even number of two or three (in this case; Girly girl and Nerd). But it doesn’t mean the quiz is wrong. In fact, that is exactly what it’s supposed to look like!

People are made up of so many different character traits. Talents, appearances, cultural backgrounds. That is what makes humans unique! So, if one person can be; a nerdy, half-Indian, half-Swedish, ballerina with the confidence of a rebel… How on earth could you possibly find a group of friends with exactly the same profile?… I’m not answering that, if you haven’t got it by now…

Yes, guys and gals. In my high school years, I became affiliated with a bunch of kids who would rather geek-out over Animae than Ballet. But we are friends because we have a mutual love of Superheroes and the same sense of humour. Most importantly, we’re loyal and we respect each other’s differences… that’s a real friendship group.

Friendship groups reflect society. Yeah, we have things in common, but we’re mostly diverse.

Finally, a big difference that we have in Australian schools compared to American schools, is the whole uniform policy. I know some schools in America do have uniforms, but I haven’t heard of one mainstream school in this country that is without a school uniform.

In my younger school years, I used to hate school uniforms (I still kinda do, sometimes). I would write persuasive essays on why we shouldn’t have school uniforms with arguments like; It’s taking away our freedom of expression! But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to understand why uniforms are important and are in fact a brilliant idea!

I think it’s not so much about what the clothes represent as much as it is what they don’t. With a uniform, everyone is the same, everyone is equal. There’s no competition and therefore there is no reason for somebody to be excluded. We’re all a part of the school community. What we wear doesn’t reflect our socio-economic or financial background and it certainty doesn’t distinguish what type of person we are or group we’re affiliated with other than a student of the school.

For our high school in particular, the uniform is about pride! Being proud of the school that we come from and representing the positive values that we’ve gained at school, while we are out in the community. I think that’s why our principal is always so hard on us about it and although it’s sometimes annoying… I get it!

I also think that it’s an important aspect of the social groups in the school. We aren’t defined or divided by what we wear. Simple as that.

So that’s my take on what a real school looks like, and how friendship groups really work. None of these Mean Girls-type social structures. It’s all bullshit.

But hey… it makes for pretty good entertainment I’ll admit.

Have a lovely day! Xx

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